my problem

as some of you may know, i have recently adopted a new hobby: bouldering.

bouldering has more or less taken over my life. it occupies maybe 30% of my waking thought (a conservative estimate!). for how much i think about climbing, you’d think i’d be better at it, but alas — i am not. this fact saddens me greatly.

my problem is this: i care greatly about climbing. i also care greatly about how i look. thus stands my problem: how do i look drippy while climbing?

this question, while deceptively simple on the surface, has far more factors to it than meets the eye. i will list them out for you.

1. mobility

whatever outfit i choose to climb in must allow me my full range of mobility. i must be able to move freely! to ascend the rocks as and when i wish, not held back by fabric!

2. sweat

climbing is a sport. as with all sports, i get sweaty. i want to maximise comfort while climbing, so i would like my outfits to allow me to get minimally sweaty.

“ok ry,” you may say. “thats just two things! in fact, you could even just phrase the whole thing as trying to Maximise Comfort!”

to that i will say: you are right. but i am a picky girl! and i have run into many issues that i am unable to sort neatly into beautiful categories. taxonomy was never my strong suit. you will have to forgive me. let me try to explain it this way:

when i first started bouldering, my default outfit was an oversized shirt and cargo pants. this served me well as i worked my way through the beginner routes.

then i started getting better. and the weather started getting hotter. and i started trying harder on the wall.

my cargo pants were no longer cutting it. if you are even semi familiar with the fashion trends these days you will know that there is one simple rule to all of it: the baggier the better. but these baggy, low crotched pants weren’t cutting it. they were restricting my mobility! with some of my pants, there would be at least six inches of rise (crotch space) holding me back from raising my foot barely above my KNEE!

this would not do. not at all. how was i to high-step? to swing my legs back and forth when attempting coordis?

i switched to shorts.

i was free! my calves and thighs, out into the world for all to see! behold: legs! free to breathe and touch rocks! i could do whatever i wanted on the rocks, unrestrained! the world was my oyster!

also, the weather was steadily getting hotter. bouldering is an indoor sport, but my commute consists of at least 30minutes of walking under the sun, and the gym staff were starting to get stingier with the air conditioning. shorts were a welcome reprieve for my legs from my humongous, heat-retaining baggy cargo pants.

but this joy was short-lived. very soon, my clumsy ass started getting bruises and scrapes on my legs, without long pants to protect them. this i could deal with. what i could not live with was having to endure the commute on public transport and feeling my bare sweaty thighs touch the plastic of the MRT seat. sensory nightmare.

along with the increased sweatiness, i’d also started to climb in my sports bra. #FULLFREEDOM! now my arms were fully unrestrained as well! free from the prison of sleeves! but now i had to worry about coordinating my sports bra with my shorts. you may not know this about me, but i am built very much like a door. as i’ve grown older i’ve learnt to circumvent this by very carefully picking what silhouettes i wear and sticking firmly to those silhouettes. but faced with my meagre collection of two (2) sports bras and a smattering of mismatched shorts, i found myself looking, once again, like a door. unpleasant.

i’ve forgotten to mention that i do not own very many shorts either. my current favourite pair of shorts are the men’s uniqlo airism shorts. they look like this:

i will be honest: they aren’t the most flattering. i have to roll up the waistband so that they fit me better. but they are loose, and comfortable, and have two MASSIVE POCKETS that can fit perhaps the entire world in them. so i am a fan. they are also long enough to protect my thighs (ALL of them) from any surface i may choose to sit on. so they are very good indeed.

however the image of a girl in a sports bra and baggy men’s shorts with the waistband rolled up and the tag sticking out is not the best. and i want to look good! i like looking good. i want to look at least Presentable when i take videos of myself climbing! so this really puts a spanner in the works.

(i have other more well-fitting shorts, but they don’t have pockets, which makes it a bit of a hassle to travel in them… nowhere to put my phone or keys! also, see above about too-short shorts being a sensory nightmare)

i switched back to pants.

i immediately regretted this decision. it is so bloody hot in the gym and outside. i can’t go back to wearing pants. my sensory tolerance is at an All Time Low, and my ability to withstand the heat is now close to none. so i have now decided that i will switch, permanently, back to shorts.

which leaves me with the question: how the hell do i look drippy in shorts?

any answers and input will be much appreciated.

love,

ry